I’ve had some great conversations over the last month with several parents who have children of all ages, from babies to teenagers. One of the common themes has been about what we do as parents and go through as people.
Having a baby can be about adapting to the new responsibilities, to this new focus and demand on our time. New parents learn to be patient and flexible, to live with tiredness, to meet the needs of their children and to become selfless as life changes to revolve around their family.
We worry, we can feel guilty and we are determined to get it right. We also learn to be calm and gentle, to be instinctive, to listen and to accept that we won’t always have the answers. We can give ourselves a hard time for not being able to easily fix or solve a challenge, for feeling stressed or overwhelmed, for not enjoying every second and for needing some time to ourselves. It doesn’t matter how much we love our children or how happy they make us, we sometimes have to dig deep.
This is why it can be important to add a positive perspective, especially after a tough day or week. To think about what went well and how a problem or a challenge was dealt with, as well as reflecting on whether anything could have been done differently, can make a difference. Parenting isn’t always easy, there are many joys but it also demands a lot of us and we have to keep going, making it up as we go.
Parents provide the safety, we settle and soothe, we nurse and teach, we feed and care and live with great responsibilities. And some weeks it feels like a lot!
So I’d like you to think about 3 things that went well this week.
Keep it brief, don’t overthink it or spend loads of time on it but it really helps to be your own cheerleader so you can focus on something positive rather than just on what has been tricky.
Something as simple as this can also help to feel more confident and resilient, it may also help you to identify if you need some more support. I’d love to know how you get on.
You can also use really quick and simple breathing skills for calm and focus and to manage stress and anxiety. Bringing it into your day helps it to become a familiar and useful skill.
Please do leave me a comment and you can also work with me if it would be helpful to talk things through.
Needed this today and after a challenging week!