Baby sleep has to be one of the biggest causes of frustration, concern and battles. Lack of sleep is exhausting and it can leave parents in need of solutions - which is why it is a profitable area full of ‘sleep experts’.
Here’s the thing about sleep - there aren’t really any solutions because there is isn’t really anything to fix - night-wakings are normal and their sleep can be different each night.
And it’s also worth pointing out that, as adults, our nights are not the same either - we can have trouble getting to sleep, we can wake in the night, we also go to bed and wake at different times.
Babies can wake throughout the night for food and reassurance and most need help to get to sleep - this independence is usually something that comes as they get older, when they can. The confusion comes because some babies do sleep well, they don’t need much help - these babies do this because they can, it’s not something that can be taught. Babies can wake because they:
are hungry or thirsty
are uncomfortable
don’t want to be on their own
need help to get to sleep or back to sleep
want to be awake for a while
While some things can enhance sleep - having contact for sleep and naps, being clean and comfortable - the desire for a full night of sleep is often an unrealistic expectation and the goal of trying to achieve this can be exhausting.
I feel strongly that we need to normalise how babies sleep and I do wonder whether, if new parents expected not to have much sleep for up to 2 years, there would be fewer battles and the focus would be on coping with the lack of sleep. If parents are encouraged to focus on their baby’s needs and cues it is possible to go with the flow a little more.
My baby sleep guide looks at the science of baby sleep, why babies can’t sleep for longer, night-time parenting, tips for coping with tiredness and expectations around sleep to boost your knowledge and your confidence.
You have access to the baby sleep guide (password: member2023) - please do leave comments and questions below and you can also arrange a consultation with me to talk about your baby’s sleep and how your are managing with your baby’s sleep.