I have been a birth doula since 2009 and every birth I have been part of has been different - from inductions to homebirths, from first babies to a fifth baby, from low risk to high risk, from labours lasting days to minutes - and the needs of parents have varied.
I am booked by parents who want some ongoing support at the end of their pregnancy and during labour, someone they can trust and make them feel safe however their labour unfolds. Trust and connection is important during labour and birth and I have the time to prioritise this.
The benefit of using a birth doula is that you can have support as you need it during early labour, when it is too soon for midwifery care but things are changing and building and it is easy to feel overwhelmed and isolated.
As a doula, I have seen how feeling unsupported can quickly create panic and a loss of control, I have seen how a change of midwife can create uncertainty and fear and I have seen how needs/plans can shift. I have also seen the importance of reassuring partners, who need to know what they are seeing is normal and okay.
Being present throughout many labours means I have also worked alongside many midwives which has given me an insight into different the attitudes and behaviours in the labour room. As a doula, I have a calm presence and I am there to provide emotional and practical support, to help parents to remain calm - I have felt welcomed in the birth space, I have encountered some bemusement as to my role and I have experienced open hostility. There can be a lot of misunderstanding about the role of a doula, thankfully I have always been able to put people at ease because I don’t have a dominant presence, I listen and I don’t have agenda, I am there to support the parents with the birth of their baby.
A doula complements midwifery care. My focus is on the parents, specifically on the woman in labour, so they are calm, informed, reassured and able to take it step by step. This frees midwives to observe, provide any medical care and balance the needs of the unit.
Being a doula has also provided me with an insight into the hierarchy within maternity units and how communication is everything. One of my clients needed quite a lot of support and she really benefited from 1:1 support from her midwife, who worked really well with us. The midwife was not able to say she wanted to provide 1:1 care, as this would not work with the staff in charge during that shift so the request had to come from my client. There is always a balance to be found on a maternity unit, to effectively look after all of the women in labour, but saying what you need gives you a voice which needs to be considered.
During another labour my client was classed as high risk but really wanted to use a birthing pool. When she was booked in I enquired about her options to use water and the midwife said she couldn’t see a problem with it and after a conversation with the consultant in charge during that shift, we headed to the birth pool room. It really confirmed to me the importance of always asking questions and finding out your options.
Being a doula has also confirmed the uniqueness of birth for me - each has its own pace and demands and labouring women need to work with that. There isn’t a right length of labour and needs can change depending on what labour is like and how long it is - the longest labour I have been at was 3 days, the shortest lasted for 20 minutes.
The basic essentials for birth are for a labouring women to:
feel safe
move
breathe
understand what is happening
to be as comfortable as possible
rest
say what you need
go with what feels right for you
Some women will dilate slowly and their labours will gently plod, others can dilate quickly and the needs/options within both will be different, which is why it is important to be at the centre of your care so you can focus on what you need and what choices you have.
Being a doula also forms a huge part of my practice as an antenatal and postnatal practitioner so my guides and consultations for birth preparation are based on the evidence as well as experience and the individuality of labour, birth and parent needs.
Please do leave a comment or question below and if you can also arrange a conversation with me to focus on your birth preparation.